well
I guess I'm alone again

I guess this was always meant to be
my true state
that I can't handle anyone
or no one can handle me
or I just don't deserve to have someone
suffer with me on my haphazard journey through life

and this is why I can't feel religion
because singing at church
can't possibly cleanse the sin in my body
the poison in my blood
can't possibly cure me
and I fight
and I take more
because that poison's all that's keeping me alive

so now, what direction will I have?
no friends who know me
no family to outlive me
no partner to accompany me
through life's million trials

but maybe this is what I should have been looking for all along
this natural state
this proper state
this righteous state

v'always been alone
l'always be alone

and someday, after smelling the same cologne every morning for 20 years, will you feel stuck? will you want a way out but be unable to find one? or will that smell bring you comfort? will it give you your place in the world?

please let me know.

heard a car coming up the road
thought it was you,
coming to make it up to me
then remembered you couldn't drive